dq409
05-18-2006, 01:24 PM
Harley-Davidson to Abandon Motorcycles
Due to a higher volume in the sale of clothing, accessories and other
Harley-Davidson paraphernalia, coupled with a further squeeze on
overpriced, underperforming machinery, Harley-Davidson has partnered
with Proptronics Ltd. to produce a specialty motorcycle called
'Stylin' Iron'. Proptronics is the company known for making fake
appliances that are used in model homes for purposes of show only.
In a brilliant management decision, Harley-Davidson decided to face
the fact that the only reason most people buy their equipment is
indeed as a fashion accessory. By building a prop motorcycle, costs
can be dramatically cut and the new Stylin' Iron will have the look
and feel of a real Harley motorcycle, which equipped with a recorded
potato-potato synthesizer, smoky air pump to simulate exhaust, and
even an adjustable rate oil leak.
The bike is priced at under $1,200 and is available immediately. Sales
are expected to soar as the new model will allow Harley enthusiasts to
spend more money on leather, hats, sunglasses and jewelry due to no
longer having to be concerned about keeping the machinery in actual
running and riding condition.
The expected surge in accessory sales has prompted the Milwaukee
Company to begin talks with the American clothing designer Dickies to
help supply genuine Harley-Davidson clothing, and K-Mart will feature
the new Stylin' Irons in their sporting goods department.
A spokesman for Harley-Davidson commented: 'We expect Stylin' Iron to
be a huge success and relieve the company of having to deal with
complaints from the minority of customers who understand motorcycling,
and can turn full time attention to the fashion conscious customers
who buys our product to function equally as well as the rest of the
Harley-Davidson line of motorcycles, in a fashion sense.
Some of our engineers who have tested the new machine claim it
actually performs just as well on the road also, given a suitable
downhill grade and tailwind.'
Due to a higher volume in the sale of clothing, accessories and other
Harley-Davidson paraphernalia, coupled with a further squeeze on
overpriced, underperforming machinery, Harley-Davidson has partnered
with Proptronics Ltd. to produce a specialty motorcycle called
'Stylin' Iron'. Proptronics is the company known for making fake
appliances that are used in model homes for purposes of show only.
In a brilliant management decision, Harley-Davidson decided to face
the fact that the only reason most people buy their equipment is
indeed as a fashion accessory. By building a prop motorcycle, costs
can be dramatically cut and the new Stylin' Iron will have the look
and feel of a real Harley motorcycle, which equipped with a recorded
potato-potato synthesizer, smoky air pump to simulate exhaust, and
even an adjustable rate oil leak.
The bike is priced at under $1,200 and is available immediately. Sales
are expected to soar as the new model will allow Harley enthusiasts to
spend more money on leather, hats, sunglasses and jewelry due to no
longer having to be concerned about keeping the machinery in actual
running and riding condition.
The expected surge in accessory sales has prompted the Milwaukee
Company to begin talks with the American clothing designer Dickies to
help supply genuine Harley-Davidson clothing, and K-Mart will feature
the new Stylin' Irons in their sporting goods department.
A spokesman for Harley-Davidson commented: 'We expect Stylin' Iron to
be a huge success and relieve the company of having to deal with
complaints from the minority of customers who understand motorcycling,
and can turn full time attention to the fashion conscious customers
who buys our product to function equally as well as the rest of the
Harley-Davidson line of motorcycles, in a fashion sense.
Some of our engineers who have tested the new machine claim it
actually performs just as well on the road also, given a suitable
downhill grade and tailwind.'