Didn't we have.....

Junkman 104

Well Seasoned Member
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JED

Well Known Member
Supporting Member 5
Back and forth. . . .
in and out . . .
a little to the right. .
a little to the left . .

she could feel the sweat on her forehead . . .
between her breasts. .
and, trickling down the small of her back. . .
she was getting near to the end.

He was in ecstasy .
with a huge smile on his face as his wife moved. . .
forwards then backwards. .
forward then backward.

again. . .
and again. .

her heart was pounding now. . .
her face was flushed . . .
she moaned softly at first, then began to groan louder . .

finally . . .
totally exhausted . she let out a piercing scream . . . .

"OK, OK, you smug bastard, I can't parallel park. You do it!

(What were you thinking this was about???)
John
 

Dick MacKenzie

Well Known Member
Supporting Member 9
The royal family.........

Camilla Parker Bowles bought a new pair of shoes for her wedding which got increasingly tighter and tighter as the day went on.
That night after the festivities were finally over, she and Prince
Charles had retired to their room at the Buckingham Palace.
Camilla flopped on the bed and said 'Please remove my shoes darling, they are killing me.
Ever obedient, the Prince of Wales attacked her right shoe with vigour. But it would not budge.
'Harder' yelled Camilla.
'Harder?' Charles yelled back,
'I'm trying darling! But it's just so bloody tight!' 'Come on, give it all you've got ' she cried.
Finally when it released, Charles let out a big groan, and Camilla exclaimed 'Oh God, that feels so good.'
in their bedroom next door, The Queen turned to Prince Phillip and said,'See, I told you she would still be a virgin with a face like that.
Meanwhile back in the other bedroom Charles was attempting to remove the other shoe when he cried out 'Oh god, darling this one's even tighter.
At which point, Prince Phillip turned and said to the Queen: 'That's my boy, once a Navy man, always a Navy man!
 

Junky

Well Known Member
In Too Far:
A man and a woman were dating. She being of a religious nature had held back the worldly pleasure that he wanted so bad. In fact, he had never even seen her naked. One day, as they drove down
the freeway, she remarked about his slow driving habits. "I can't stand it anymore," she told him. "Let's play a game. For every 5 miles per hour over the speed limit you drive, I'll remove one piece of clothing." He enthusiastically agreed and sped up the car. He reached the 55 MPH mark, so she took off her blouse. At 60 off came the pants. At 65 it was her bra and at 70 her panties. Now seeing her naked for the first time and traveling faster than he ever had before, he became very excited and lost control of the car.
He veered off the road over an embankment and wrapped the car around a tree. His girlfriend was thrown clear but he was trapped. She tried to pull him free but alas he was stuck. "Go up to the road and get help," he said. "But I haven't anything to cover myself with!" she replied. The man felt around, but could only reach one of his shoes. "You'll have to put this between your legs to cover it up," he told her. So she did as he said and went up to the road for help.
Shortly after, along came a police car. Seeing a naked, crying woman along the road, the officer pulled over to hear her story. "My boyfriend my boyfriend!" she sobs, "He's stuck and I can't pull him out!" The officer, looking down at the shoe between her legs replies, "Ma'am, if he's in that far, I'm afraid he's a goner!
 
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