> >A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinarian. As she lay her
> >pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the
> >bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and
> >said, "I'm so sorry, Cuddles has passed away."
> >
> >The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?"
> >
> >"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied.
> >
> >"How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any
> >testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
> >
> >The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, returning a
> >few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner
> >looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front
> >paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom.
> >He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet
> >patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few moments later with a
> >beautiful cat, who jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at
> >the bird. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed
> >softly and strolled out of the room.
> >
> >The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is
> >most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
> >
> >Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys, and
> >produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
> >
> >The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried,
> >"$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"
> >
> >The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill
> >would have been only $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, the
> >prices go way up."
> >pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the
> >bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and
> >said, "I'm so sorry, Cuddles has passed away."
> >
> >The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?"
> >
> >"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied.
> >
> >"How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any
> >testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
> >
> >The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, returning a
> >few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner
> >looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front
> >paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom.
> >He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet
> >patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few moments later with a
> >beautiful cat, who jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at
> >the bird. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed
> >softly and strolled out of the room.
> >
> >The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is
> >most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
> >
> >Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys, and
> >produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
> >
> >The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried,
> >"$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"
> >
> >The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill
> >would have been only $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, the
> >prices go way up."